Secrets of Sylvia

I haven't posted in a long time...not that I didn't want to post anything, or that I didn't have anything to vent about, but mostly things I want to write about get tiresome for readers, I'm sure, because I just want to complain. So, sorry about that.

In case you haven't noticed, I have a lot of issues with the company I work for. Particularly, one of the bosses I work for. I have this love/hate thing for her. I sympathize with her when things are piling up on her, but I want to scream at the top of my lungs when I see how manipulative she is. The thing is, we're a lot alike...and there's so many things that I see in her that I don't like about myself. But these things that I realize are limiting and tend to hurt people in the long run, she tends to view as virtues in her.

I know, I'm vague, which is confusing, but perhaps you can get an idea of how strange and confusing this situation for me is. Anyhow, this definitely isn't a healthy relationship, so it's time for me to move on with my life.

So I'll be returning to America as soon as Boss Lady finds a replacement for me.

So now what? What am I going to do with my life? I really don't know.

To tell the truth, it's exciting--I mean I could take so many different paths from here. At the same time, I'm terribly frightened.

Mostly, I'm frightened I won't ever really do anything with my life. I'll settle for something because I'm too scared to take the risk on something I'm passionate about.

But first, the wait. I wish I at least knew when I was leaving so I could look into buying plane tickets. This whole "stay until we find a replacement" is turning out to be more stress than I thought it would be.